#85: Healing the Leader Within: Brent Perkins on Energy, Awareness, and Capacity
Healing the Leader Within: Brent Perkins on Energy, Awareness, and Capacity
Welcome back to Beyond the Pills, where we explore the edges of true healing—where ancient wisdom meets modern science, and where transformation begins from the inside out. I'm your host, Josh Rimany.
Today’s guest isn’t just a leadership expert or bestselling author—he’s been one of my own coaches, someone who’s walked with me through some of my most profound inner shifts, both professionally and personally. It’s an honor to welcome Brent Perkins to the show.
Brent is a former multi–8-figure CEO turned leadership coach who is obsessed with capacity—that inner operating system that drives everything else in life and leadership. He’s the founder of 3xBOLD and the author of Papercuts: The Art of Self-Delusion, a powerful and vulnerable work about the subtle wounds we carry in the pursuit of success.
Through his work, Brent helps growth-minded entrepreneurs and elite coaches transmute stress into energy, translating neuroscience and somatics into boardroom results and bedroom presence. He’s also a board member of Front Row Dads, and his latest venture—CAPACITY—is a curated leadership collective focused on expanding impact at work and at home.
In this episode, we’re going to explore the deep work behind leadership, the energy quadrants, the three currencies of capacity, and what it looks like to shift the culture of leadership—from burnout and disconnection, to one where we all rise together. This is going to be a powerful and deeply personal conversation."
❓ Interview Questions
Part 1: Personal Journey and Papercuts
- Brent, your book Papercuts delves into the subtle wounds we often overlook. Can you share what inspired you to write this book and how it reflects your personal journey?
- You transitioned from a high-powered corporate role to a path of personal growth and leadership transformation. What was the pivotal moment that led you to this change?
- In Papercuts, you discuss the concept of self-delusion. How can recognizing our own self-delusions serve as a catalyst for healing and growth?
Part 2: The Capacity Framework
- Your latest project, Capacity, introduces a new framework for leadership. Can you explain the core principles of this framework and how it differs from traditional leadership models?
- You mention the 'energy quadrants' in the Capacity framework. What are these quadrants, and how can understanding them enhance our leadership and personal effectiveness?
- The framework also talks about the 'three currencies of capacity.' Could you elaborate on what these currencies are and their significance in sustainable leadership?
Part 3: Shared Journey and Collective Growth
- Brent, you've been a significant part of my own healing and growth journey. From your perspective, how does holding space for others contribute to both personal and collective transformation?
- Our shared mission is to shift the culture of leadership towards authenticity and collective well-being. How do you envision this shift impacting organizations and communities?
- For listeners who are leaders or aspiring to lead, what practical steps can they take to begin aligning their leadership with the principles you've discussed?
🔗 Links:
- Website: 3xBOLD
- Book: Papercuts: The Art of Self-Delusion
- LinkedIn: Brent Perkins
Transcript
Welcome back to this episode
Speaker:of the Beyond the Pills,
Speaker:where we explore the edges
Speaker:of true healing,
Speaker:where ancient wisdom meets modern science,
Speaker:and where transformation
Speaker:begins from the inside out.
Speaker:I'm your host, Josh Remini.
Speaker:Today's guest...
Speaker:isn't just a leadership
Speaker:expert or best selling author.
Speaker:He's been one of my personal coaches,
Speaker:a very good friend of mine,
Speaker:and someone who's walked
Speaker:with me through some of my
Speaker:most profound inner shifts,
Speaker:both professionally and personally.
Speaker:It's an honor,
Speaker:a really big honor to welcome my friend,
Speaker:my brother, Brent Perkins to the show.
Speaker:Brent is a former multi-aid figure,
Speaker:a CEO turned leadership
Speaker:coach who is obsessed with capacity,
Speaker:that inner operating system
Speaker:that drives everything else
Speaker:in life and leadership.
Speaker:He's the founder of Three X
Speaker:Bold and the author of Paper Cuts,
Speaker:The Art of Self-Delusion,
Speaker:a powerful and vulnerable
Speaker:work about the subtle
Speaker:wounds we carry in the
Speaker:pursuit of success.
Speaker:Through his work,
Speaker:Brent helps growth-minded
Speaker:entrepreneurs and elite
Speaker:coaches transmute energy or
Speaker:stress into energy,
Speaker:translating neuroscience
Speaker:and somatics into boardroom
Speaker:results and bedroom presence.
Speaker:He's also a board member of Front Row Dads,
Speaker:a community we are both in.
Speaker:and his latest venture, Capacity,
Speaker:is a curated leadership
Speaker:collective focused on
Speaker:expanding impact at work and at the home.
Speaker:In this episode,
Speaker:we are gonna dive and
Speaker:explore into the deep work
Speaker:behind leadership, my story,
Speaker:and Brent's story,
Speaker:and energy quadrants the
Speaker:three currencies of
Speaker:capacity and what it looks
Speaker:like to shift the culture
Speaker:of leadership from burnout
Speaker:and disconnection to one
Speaker:where we all rise together
Speaker:I can't wait for this one
Speaker:guys uh this has been a
Speaker:long time coming my friend
Speaker:uh it's gonna be very
Speaker:powerful and deeply
Speaker:personal so welcome to the
Speaker:show my friend my brother
Speaker:brent perkins so excited
Speaker:josh thank you man
Speaker:We've been on a journey, haven't we?
Speaker:To say the least.
Speaker:I'm so excited to have you
Speaker:on the show because you've
Speaker:been such an integral part
Speaker:of my own transformation
Speaker:and healing over this past year.
Speaker:And we'll get into that.
Speaker:But let's talk a little bit
Speaker:about your personal journey
Speaker:and where you've come from
Speaker:and what inspired you.
Speaker:These things like
Speaker:your book which is amazing
Speaker:and and transitioning from
Speaker:like high-powered corporate
Speaker:to personal leadership and
Speaker:and professional leadership
Speaker:coach where is this all
Speaker:about tell people a little
Speaker:bit about brent and where
Speaker:he came from yeah there's a
Speaker:lot to share and yet um the
Speaker:simple part is is that I
Speaker:just I did what I was
Speaker:groomed to do what I was
Speaker:you know,
Speaker:told I needed to do the things
Speaker:that were going to make my parents happy.
Speaker:You know,
Speaker:I grew up in an entrepreneurial family.
Speaker:My dad started businesses
Speaker:and he did pretty well.
Speaker:And my mom had a lot of
Speaker:hope and dreams and knowing
Speaker:that we would be successful in some way.
Speaker:So I chased it.
Speaker:I chased it all over the
Speaker:place from my personal
Speaker:relationships to my
Speaker:professional endeavors.
Speaker:And I got lost in it for a lot of years.
Speaker:And it was about five years
Speaker:ago where things really
Speaker:started to unravel.
Speaker:Right around the age of forty,
Speaker:maybe a little longer than that.
Speaker:things really were
Speaker:unsustainable in my life.
Speaker:I didn't, I didn't look at it that way.
Speaker:You know, things felt good.
Speaker:I was making good money.
Speaker:Business was fun and successful.
Speaker:I didn't understand how much
Speaker:of a lack of presence I had at home.
Speaker:I thought it was okay.
Speaker:Cause I was there quite a
Speaker:bit when I wasn't traveling,
Speaker:which was too much,
Speaker:but I didn't understand
Speaker:what the true lack of presence I really,
Speaker:really had.
Speaker:And yeah,
Speaker:I couldn't put my finger on
Speaker:it and it just all unraveled, you know,
Speaker:a twenty year marriage fell apart.
Speaker:My kids.
Speaker:You know, really,
Speaker:my relationship with them
Speaker:struggled deeply.
Speaker:And my business,
Speaker:it didn't struggle directly,
Speaker:but my ability to show up with the energy,
Speaker:with the attention,
Speaker:with the presence that
Speaker:needed was just floundering.
Speaker:So.
Speaker:That kind of led to three years ago,
Speaker:which is where you and I
Speaker:kind of met and started
Speaker:working together and where
Speaker:I started the journey of
Speaker:writing this book out of the blue.
Speaker:But I wrote it for me.
Speaker:It was part of my journey.
Speaker:And that was the precipice
Speaker:to lead us to where we're at today.
Speaker:Well,
Speaker:I want to talk a little bit about the
Speaker:book because.
Speaker:and how we met and where
Speaker:like how we started working
Speaker:together not just
Speaker:professionally you know
Speaker:we're very close and we're
Speaker:on our journeys together
Speaker:here um but your book paper
Speaker:cuts it does it delves into
Speaker:the subtle wounds of
Speaker:we often overlook and just,
Speaker:can you share your story?
Speaker:Cause it is really powerful and it's fun.
Speaker:Cause I know the backstory, but I want to,
Speaker:I want you to share,
Speaker:but like what inspired you
Speaker:to write the book?
Speaker:You said he wrote it for you
Speaker:and it's in your first pages of your book,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:This isn't for anyone.
Speaker:It's for you.
Speaker:And how does that reflect in
Speaker:your personal journey?
Speaker:Because I think it's really good.
Speaker:This book is amazing.
Speaker:And it really helped me out
Speaker:in my transitions.
Speaker:Well, it's funny.
Speaker:This is how you know the
Speaker:book's either for you or not,
Speaker:because this either
Speaker:resonates or it will frustrate you.
Speaker:But the dedication says this
Speaker:book was written for Brent Perkins.
Speaker:Yes, myself.
Speaker:If I'm able to help myself,
Speaker:then I've done all that I can.
Speaker:My deepest hope is that
Speaker:through my dedication to
Speaker:myself and the work that only I can do,
Speaker:somehow it touches others,
Speaker:inspiring them to look
Speaker:inside and do the work that
Speaker:only they can do.
Speaker:I share that because you
Speaker:know I've been called a
Speaker:selfish narcissist for
Speaker:writing that and yet um at
Speaker:its core it's the exact
Speaker:opposite right it's yeah
Speaker:it's my lesson of learning
Speaker:that I can't fix anybody
Speaker:else any other situation
Speaker:except me that's all I have
Speaker:control over get the chills
Speaker:on that one and only because
Speaker:What I love about you and
Speaker:what about that is you know
Speaker:exactly if that's for you or not.
Speaker:If you think it's
Speaker:egotistical and narcissistic,
Speaker:don't read that book.
Speaker:What the true essence of
Speaker:that is is what we both have learned,
Speaker:what you've taught me in
Speaker:different ways and what
Speaker:I've learned in different ways,
Speaker:which is do you first.
Speaker:You talk about the... You taught me how...
Speaker:Like that concept of self-full.
Speaker:I say it all the time now
Speaker:because it's not selfish.
Speaker:It's not selfless.
Speaker:It's filling your... We
Speaker:always talk about this, right?
Speaker:Fill your bucket up so it
Speaker:can overflow so everyone
Speaker:else can benefit.
Speaker:That's what you're saying there.
Speaker:It's like, if I'm not...
Speaker:my purest self my wholeness
Speaker:like my journey to
Speaker:wholeness was what brought
Speaker:me to you that says dude I
Speaker:need to help I need some
Speaker:help in categories here um
Speaker:and that's why I love that
Speaker:book because from the very
Speaker:beginning even when you
Speaker:were writing it we were
Speaker:talking through why you
Speaker:were writing it and what
Speaker:these things is like
Speaker:That's so important because
Speaker:from the very beginning,
Speaker:you were doing it not to get fame,
Speaker:not to get books sold.
Speaker:You were literally doing it
Speaker:to continue your process of
Speaker:becoming whole.
Speaker:And in that process,
Speaker:you're helping others.
Speaker:And that's where I think you
Speaker:and I have grown into this
Speaker:space of no longer teaching people
Speaker:the stuff it's through our
Speaker:own experience and people
Speaker:learning through experience.
Speaker:And you discuss that concept
Speaker:in your book quite a bit.
Speaker:And, and I love the stories.
Speaker:So it's, it's amazing.
Speaker:It's so cool.
Speaker:It's interesting, Josh, for a while.
Speaker:And I still do occasionally, you know,
Speaker:people ask what I do and,
Speaker:I say I'm on a mission for permission.
Speaker:Of course,
Speaker:most people don't understand
Speaker:what I'm talking about.
Speaker:But whether this is true as
Speaker:men and or as business leaders,
Speaker:and this is true for women too,
Speaker:I just think men more than
Speaker:anything grab onto what I'm about to say,
Speaker:which is we don't need advice.
Speaker:We don't need to be told what to do.
Speaker:We don't need a prescription because we
Speaker:What I wrote about in this
Speaker:book is finding your agency,
Speaker:finding your truth,
Speaker:grabbing choice and holding
Speaker:onto it for dear life,
Speaker:because that is the single
Speaker:gift we've all been given by our creator,
Speaker:by the higher source,
Speaker:whatever you call it, is free will.
Speaker:And when we exercise it for ourselves,
Speaker:there is no greater gift.
Speaker:to ourselves, to the world.
Speaker:And I didn't want to write
Speaker:something that told people
Speaker:how to do what I did.
Speaker:The way I did it, the way you did it,
Speaker:the way I watched you do it,
Speaker:the way I watched you and
Speaker:support you do your work,
Speaker:it was like nobody else had ever seen.
Speaker:And we each have to go on our own journey.
Speaker:So this permission piece is this sharing.
Speaker:Our journey is still vulnerable,
Speaker:which is kind of what we're doing today.
Speaker:That it gives people
Speaker:permission to go to this depth,
Speaker:explore themselves.
Speaker:because it feels a little
Speaker:safer because you've seen
Speaker:somebody else do it.
Speaker:Well, and we talk a lot about that a lot,
Speaker:like just coaching and
Speaker:being in the tribes that we're in,
Speaker:like in Front Row Dads.
Speaker:Yeah, if we say FRD,
Speaker:that's what we're saying
Speaker:because we just say it so often.
Speaker:We just say FRD.
Speaker:A bunch of really good
Speaker:growth-centered guys that
Speaker:want to be family men with businesses,
Speaker:not businessmen with families.
Speaker:And that's why I joined.
Speaker:And that's where I met these
Speaker:awesome people.
Speaker:But it's holding space, that container,
Speaker:which is what you did.
Speaker:You didn't do any... This is
Speaker:why I say coaches don't play the game.
Speaker:The player plays the game.
Speaker:The coach is the guide in the journey.
Speaker:He's watching.
Speaker:I love how you say that.
Speaker:Like,
Speaker:your journey is different than my
Speaker:journey.
Speaker:And you watched me...
Speaker:do the work and make those choice points.
Speaker:So those were the biggest
Speaker:choice points I made this
Speaker:summer going through the
Speaker:process of discovery and
Speaker:wholeness and authenticity
Speaker:and finding my truth and
Speaker:traveling all over the
Speaker:world and doing all the
Speaker:medicines and all the
Speaker:healing and all the things that I did.
Speaker:But at the end of the day,
Speaker:I love where you brought this up.
Speaker:It's I had to make those choices for me.
Speaker:from a place that wasn't wounded, right?
Speaker:A place of true authenticity
Speaker:is I'm going in.
Speaker:I'm going in and I know
Speaker:there's going to be people
Speaker:that don't agree.
Speaker:but I'm doing it for me.
Speaker:And if I don't do it for me,
Speaker:then I'm choosing others,
Speaker:not in a selfish way.
Speaker:You taught me this from the
Speaker:very beginning is like,
Speaker:and you're super good.
Speaker:Like the way I want to coach
Speaker:is they're going to ask me
Speaker:the hard questions that I got to go.
Speaker:Oh,
Speaker:Yeah,
Speaker:I got to think on that one because
Speaker:I'm a big thinker, you know me.
Speaker:And you asked me those hard,
Speaker:difficult questions because
Speaker:that's where that choice comes from,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:Making those choices to, you know,
Speaker:Separate from my family,
Speaker:separate from my business
Speaker:because I knew I had to do
Speaker:something more like that.
Speaker:I know you've worked with
Speaker:these high level
Speaker:entrepreneurs like me that
Speaker:have done things and all this stuff.
Speaker:But at the end of the day,
Speaker:it's because we're
Speaker:questioning our life and
Speaker:moving into that what I
Speaker:call the second mountain, right?
Speaker:The life of the inside out,
Speaker:not the outside in.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And this is this is where I
Speaker:think you and I have had
Speaker:such great conversations
Speaker:over the years because
Speaker:we're in alignment there.
Speaker:And you are your call.
Speaker:Your calling has been
Speaker:beautiful because you are
Speaker:moving in the direction
Speaker:you've moved in that direction.
Speaker:Full, full, full steam, like full,
Speaker:full time.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:This is not part time.
Speaker:Like,
Speaker:I'm just going to help people here
Speaker:and there.
Speaker:Like you're creating you've created this.
Speaker:community around leadership,
Speaker:but it's more than business leadership,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:It's more than just, you know,
Speaker:self-empowerment and
Speaker:thinking like it's this whole,
Speaker:how do we put it all together,
Speaker:but in your way, right?
Speaker:In your way, in my way, in everyone's way,
Speaker:because we're,
Speaker:we're all going down the same.
Speaker:I always say this.
Speaker:It's like,
Speaker:It seems like the formula is the same,
Speaker:but the path is different, right?
Speaker:The journey is different for everybody,
Speaker:but we have these pillars.
Speaker:We have this formula.
Speaker:And you've gone through this
Speaker:in your own journey in your book,
Speaker:Paper Cuts.
Speaker:But now it's kind of taken a
Speaker:new step for you, right?
Speaker:It's kind of taken this new edge,
Speaker:this new feel.
Speaker:It has.
Speaker:So it's interesting.
Speaker:Nobody, well, especially business leaders,
Speaker:we don't actually want to
Speaker:pay for or spend time doing
Speaker:a lot of deep personal development work,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:We know we need it a lot of times,
Speaker:but it takes too much time.
Speaker:We don't have the energy.
Speaker:We already know we're kind
Speaker:of blowing it at home or
Speaker:with our kids or with our
Speaker:spouses or our partners sometimes.
Speaker:And it feels selfish to
Speaker:spend a lot of time doing
Speaker:other work for just us, right?
Speaker:And let's be clear.
Speaker:I mean,
Speaker:a lot of it feels woo-woo and weird
Speaker:and not aligned with who we
Speaker:have to show up, like I said earlier,
Speaker:keeping that edge as a business person.
Speaker:Aligning all of these pieces
Speaker:feels incongruous on the surface.
Speaker:I get it.
Speaker:And so what I've been playing with is,
Speaker:you've already alluded to it,
Speaker:but I found everything
Speaker:starts with just a
Speaker:reflection of my own journey, right?
Speaker:Because I can only share my experiences.
Speaker:And I've tried to overlay
Speaker:the feedback I've gotten,
Speaker:the other stories from all
Speaker:those I've spent time with
Speaker:over the last decade in the
Speaker:leadership space,
Speaker:in the business ownership,
Speaker:the entrepreneurial space.
Speaker:And that is that so much of
Speaker:what we do is being
Speaker:evaluated or judged against,
Speaker:as you said earlier,
Speaker:am I being self-ish or am I
Speaker:being self-less?
Speaker:how what is my output look
Speaker:like what am I doing where
Speaker:does it fall on that
Speaker:spectrum and on the
Speaker:self-ish side is this thing
Speaker:you know it's really all
Speaker:over social media and in
Speaker:society today about being a
Speaker:narcissist that word is
Speaker:tossed around all the time
Speaker:so we've got this shame and
Speaker:guilt you know associated
Speaker:with that and on the other
Speaker:side of this thing most of
Speaker:us forget there's martyrdom
Speaker:martyrdom is pretty darn ugly
Speaker:Usually because you don't
Speaker:know you're living in it, right?
Speaker:But this is the doing spectrum.
Speaker:This is our output into the world.
Speaker:What about our input?
Speaker:What about who we're being?
Speaker:Mostly to ourselves.
Speaker:And this is what you were talking about,
Speaker:self-full.
Speaker:I actually call it self-rich.
Speaker:So we've got self-poor at
Speaker:the bottom of that spectrum
Speaker:and self-rich at the top.
Speaker:So you've got this quadrant, horizontally,
Speaker:left to right, selfish to self-less.
Speaker:And then vertically, top to bottom,
Speaker:you've got self-rich.
Speaker:poor to self-rich up top.
Speaker:And when I talk to most leaders,
Speaker:especially the ones we work with, right,
Speaker:or we're friends with,
Speaker:they all want to be servant leaders.
Speaker:They want to give.
Speaker:The problem is, is that giving, yes,
Speaker:it's selfless,
Speaker:but it's almost always from
Speaker:a state of being self-poor.
Speaker:And this is where we all get in trouble.
Speaker:Well, and that's, that was,
Speaker:that was a big deal for me.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And you know, me really well, um,
Speaker:is I love helping people.
Speaker:I'm very, um, you know,
Speaker:I'm a pro I'm a healthcare provider.
Speaker:I'm a wellness guru.
Speaker:I love helping people and I
Speaker:love helping people and.
Speaker:it was that I love this self,
Speaker:like the quadrants in my head now is like,
Speaker:I was doing it from a depleted state.
Speaker:Like I would help people at my own expense,
Speaker:not consciously.
Speaker:I would literally do it for people.
Speaker:Cause I was, it helped me.
Speaker:And I lived a life where I
Speaker:thought that was selfless for so long,
Speaker:but actually to me, it was selfish.
Speaker:Like I would help them so I
Speaker:could feel better,
Speaker:even though it was depleting me,
Speaker:even though I knew it was depleting me.
Speaker:And it was almost like this,
Speaker:it was like this shadow
Speaker:weakness of like being so helpful.
Speaker:And then you, you and some of my,
Speaker:like when I went on this journey,
Speaker:like you got me to realize
Speaker:the other side of it is like,
Speaker:when you do that from a place of fullness,
Speaker:like,
Speaker:And you've done that.
Speaker:Then then it's like I had
Speaker:the I had the priorities backwards.
Speaker:It was like, all right, your business.
Speaker:So you can have good family
Speaker:so you can be in a good
Speaker:relationship so you can
Speaker:then be fulfilled.
Speaker:And then when I flip that
Speaker:script completely and I said, do me first,
Speaker:which I teach people.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:It was a teaching of like my
Speaker:own my own medicine.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:Be full first so then you
Speaker:can be a good dad and a
Speaker:good husband so your business can thrive.
Speaker:It was like when I moved the priorities,
Speaker:one eighty.
Speaker:And I had to live that through experience.
Speaker:And I want to talk about
Speaker:that because you can't read
Speaker:this in a book and then be transformed.
Speaker:You actually have to put in,
Speaker:we call it the work, right?
Speaker:But you have to put in the reps.
Speaker:You got to make these
Speaker:decisions that you know are
Speaker:not going to be comfortable,
Speaker:but necessary.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And so thank you for
Speaker:bringing that light into
Speaker:the conversation because it
Speaker:is such a big thing.
Speaker:So as you were saying,
Speaker:this place of giving, on the surface,
Speaker:it looks like heroics,
Speaker:and it almost always leads
Speaker:to resentment because there
Speaker:is a selfish component.
Speaker:You're really doing it for yourself,
Speaker:whether it's to protect
Speaker:yourself and make sure that
Speaker:everybody thinks and sees
Speaker:you as this good person who's giving,
Speaker:or whether you're actually
Speaker:doing it to make yourself
Speaker:feel good that you gave.
Speaker:right?
Speaker:And then we usually have
Speaker:some sort of codependent
Speaker:attachment to it or covert
Speaker:contract that we want
Speaker:something back in return
Speaker:from it without telling people.
Speaker:Sounds like really, really great giving,
Speaker:huh?
Speaker:Well, and you know,
Speaker:your self-talk tells you it's okay,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:Your self-talk is like,
Speaker:you're a great guy.
Speaker:You can do all this stuff
Speaker:and everybody's good.
Speaker:But at the end of the day,
Speaker:do you really feel fulfilled when you're
Speaker:completely wiped out and
Speaker:hadn't really put it.
Speaker:So to me,
Speaker:flipping that framework so I can
Speaker:help more people is really was really.
Speaker:And what Josh is saying in
Speaker:terms of flipping the framework,
Speaker:at least in terms of how I talk about it,
Speaker:is that if if if giving is
Speaker:in this bottom right quadrant,
Speaker:the self less.
Speaker:and the self-poor quadrant,
Speaker:where we really want to get
Speaker:to is this upper right-hand quadrant,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:Which is still selfless,
Speaker:but it's self-rich or self-full,
Speaker:as you said.
Speaker:The question is,
Speaker:or that quadrant's contributing.
Speaker:So the difference between
Speaker:giving and contributing is
Speaker:that contributing is additive.
Speaker:It's not like going to
Speaker:Goodwill every spring and
Speaker:cleaning out your house and
Speaker:giving it away,
Speaker:which who necessarily wants
Speaker:or needs that?
Speaker:It's actually seeing past
Speaker:yourself and contributing
Speaker:in a value-added way to society,
Speaker:to your business, to your family.
Speaker:So the question really comes in,
Speaker:how do we get there?
Speaker:And this is the piece we can
Speaker:spend a little bit of time talking about,
Speaker:especially in your own journey.
Speaker:But in this matrix is the
Speaker:top upper left hand quadrant.
Speaker:And that is selfish, but it's self rich.
Speaker:And it's, it's,
Speaker:I call it the developing quadrant,
Speaker:but it's really about where
Speaker:we build capacity,
Speaker:where we build resilience,
Speaker:where we really have deep
Speaker:input to ourselves.
Speaker:Well,
Speaker:let's talk about capacity because
Speaker:most people think
Speaker:and where, where this is going.
Speaker:And, and, you know, this,
Speaker:this is an awesome episode
Speaker:because a lot of the times
Speaker:we're thinking about
Speaker:healing from a place of like, what's the,
Speaker:you know,
Speaker:with functional medicine and all
Speaker:these protocols, but now we're teaching,
Speaker:we're talking about this
Speaker:balancing of these quadrants of life too,
Speaker:not just professionally and
Speaker:personally and personal growth.
Speaker:Um,
Speaker:And I think that word
Speaker:balance has been overused a lot, right?
Speaker:I don't think we're ever in balance.
Speaker:I think we're always balancing things,
Speaker:but I don't feel like,
Speaker:and I feel like the word
Speaker:capacity comes up a lot.
Speaker:Like I don't have time.
Speaker:I don't have,
Speaker:if I spend all the time on me,
Speaker:how am I gonna,
Speaker:like the mind always goes into, well,
Speaker:what about my business?
Speaker:Like if I put all the effort in me,
Speaker:then my business and family don't get.
Speaker:And so let's talk about your
Speaker:philosophy here and what
Speaker:you've been doing and what's coming,
Speaker:because I think this is,
Speaker:and in growth for all of us
Speaker:is like our personal lives
Speaker:sort of mirror our professional lives.
Speaker:But at this point,
Speaker:I think it's also mirroring
Speaker:where humanity's going.
Speaker:And I think that's what the
Speaker:big picture is here.
Speaker:I want you to explain in your way,
Speaker:because it's such a
Speaker:beautiful way to talk about it,
Speaker:this concept of capacity.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So you already said the word
Speaker:that I think most of us
Speaker:want to go towards or want
Speaker:to believe capacity really is,
Speaker:which is time, right?
Speaker:You know, you said,
Speaker:I don't have time for my family.
Speaker:I don't have time for this.
Speaker:And the problem is,
Speaker:is that time has nothing to
Speaker:do with capacity.
Speaker:It's a saboteur word for ourselves.
Speaker:It shifts the conversation
Speaker:and the attention away from
Speaker:what capacity truly is.
Speaker:And if we're talking about
Speaker:internal capacity,
Speaker:not your external stuff, not your systems,
Speaker:your software, your products,
Speaker:your services,
Speaker:those are ways that we can
Speaker:shift external capacity and play with it.
Speaker:But in terms of our internal capacity,
Speaker:this internal architecture,
Speaker:I really believe it's three things.
Speaker:It's energy,
Speaker:which is kind of the charge
Speaker:our batteries hold about our body.
Speaker:It's attention, which is more on the mind.
Speaker:It's this spotlight you hold
Speaker:and where you place your
Speaker:intention and presence.
Speaker:And this is really that
Speaker:quality people feel when
Speaker:you walk in the room.
Speaker:And when we can not just
Speaker:fill our bucket with the
Speaker:right currencies,
Speaker:But if we can expand our
Speaker:bucket and expand our capacity,
Speaker:this vault that holds these
Speaker:three currencies,
Speaker:time becomes the dividend
Speaker:that these currencies pay
Speaker:off or throw off.
Speaker:Because growing and making
Speaker:sure and really protecting
Speaker:our energy paired with
Speaker:where do we put our intention?
Speaker:Those things come together
Speaker:for how do we do in the best way,
Speaker:where our doing becomes
Speaker:really intentional and not frantic.
Speaker:And the presence piece for
Speaker:me is really around this being piece.
Speaker:It's this alignment.
Speaker:It's how do you walk in a room,
Speaker:whether that's at home or
Speaker:you walk in a boardroom or the gym?
Speaker:And people just immediately go, oh,
Speaker:that person's at peace.
Speaker:They don't need anything from me.
Speaker:I don't have to hold back.
Speaker:I don't have to pretend.
Speaker:I can just be the best me.
Speaker:Like you feel that from people.
Speaker:So how do you bring these three?
Speaker:How do you unlock these
Speaker:currencies to their highest level?
Speaker:So when you actually show up,
Speaker:it's hard to understand at first,
Speaker:but time is actually created, right?
Speaker:as we fund these currencies
Speaker:within this expanded vault
Speaker:that we're creating for ourselves.
Speaker:And to me,
Speaker:what I heard was there's this expansion,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:Expanding your capacity
Speaker:I think people can,
Speaker:I can put my head around that, right?
Speaker:Time in this world,
Speaker:like we're in time and
Speaker:space and we don't have any more time.
Speaker:We have the same amount of time,
Speaker:but capacity can be expanded.
Speaker:And we all know this, right?
Speaker:When we're in flow and we're
Speaker:in that authentic, peaceful alignment,
Speaker:attunement,
Speaker:we're in our zone of genius,
Speaker:time disappears.
Speaker:And we have ultimately,
Speaker:and we all know this,
Speaker:and we all want to get more of that.
Speaker:So I love the way you said, like,
Speaker:time create, you create more time,
Speaker:it comes to you because you
Speaker:have more capacity.
Speaker:And you know, people that are
Speaker:running, you know, six businesses.
Speaker:They've got good families.
Speaker:They've doing all this stuff
Speaker:and they're on vacation and
Speaker:they're doing this and
Speaker:they're doing this and they're doing this,
Speaker:but they're not the energy part, right?
Speaker:They're not burnout.
Speaker:They're not tired.
Speaker:They're actually completely
Speaker:fine getting up at five AM
Speaker:and doing the things they
Speaker:need to do because their
Speaker:energy is at that high.
Speaker:So you're, you're teaching people how to,
Speaker:I love that.
Speaker:contain your energy hold
Speaker:like hold that energy this
Speaker:is one of my biggest things
Speaker:that you know I'm still
Speaker:working on that's that's
Speaker:the thing that I get to
Speaker:work on because with
Speaker:empaths and people that
Speaker:feel like that's a tough
Speaker:stuff that's a tough piece
Speaker:for me is holding in in
Speaker:holding my own energy
Speaker:bubble and holding that for
Speaker:my own sake and protecting
Speaker:that um and you you sort of
Speaker:intellectually done this,
Speaker:but now you've got a
Speaker:process you're taking people through,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:You're putting through this
Speaker:process because you started
Speaker:earlier and I want to expand on this.
Speaker:Like I really, you,
Speaker:so you're saying it's kind of in,
Speaker:in this way,
Speaker:if we use these energy
Speaker:quadrants in this capacity framework,
Speaker:we can achieve where we
Speaker:want to go in all of these
Speaker:buckets of life, not just one.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Because I feel like
Speaker:everyone's choosing one or
Speaker:the other in this capacity thing.
Speaker:But for me, it's and.
Speaker:It's like,
Speaker:can we make it all happen at the
Speaker:same time?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah, I mean,
Speaker:I run a small mastermind
Speaker:that's kind of a passion project for me.
Speaker:And it's called Father, Lover, Leader.
Speaker:And it's for these same business owners,
Speaker:entrepreneurs that are dads
Speaker:and they have no idea how
Speaker:to continue being the
Speaker:leader and the success
Speaker:driven person at work while
Speaker:being a super present
Speaker:father and while being an
Speaker:incredible lover.
Speaker:And yes,
Speaker:all three are possible without any
Speaker:more effort.
Speaker:Well,
Speaker:walk us through your framework
Speaker:because I think people are like, well,
Speaker:I'm in.
Speaker:How is this new?
Speaker:It's not new.
Speaker:I don't feel like there's
Speaker:any new information here.
Speaker:It's how we present it and
Speaker:how we relate to it that matters.
Speaker:And I think in serving in these capacities,
Speaker:this framework of these currencies,
Speaker:can you elaborate on the
Speaker:process you're moving people through now?
Speaker:Yes and no, Josh,
Speaker:because my frameworks
Speaker:actually don't work for you
Speaker:or for other people.
Speaker:They're just a story.
Speaker:They are just permission, right?
Speaker:So what works is,
Speaker:is that when we have
Speaker:awareness and we understand that, oh shit,
Speaker:I'm a giver, which is great,
Speaker:but I want to be a contributor.
Speaker:And we start to understand
Speaker:where we're living,
Speaker:what's holding us back.
Speaker:We get into spaces of other
Speaker:humans doing similar type
Speaker:of work in the world and
Speaker:similar types of family and
Speaker:community scenarios as us.
Speaker:And we find our tribes, right?
Speaker:To support us, to give us permission,
Speaker:to tell us it's okay,
Speaker:to hold that space for us,
Speaker:to do this work knowing
Speaker:that we're not unique,
Speaker:we're not on an island,
Speaker:we're not special snowflake
Speaker:butterflies that are the
Speaker:only ones dealing with stuff, no.
Speaker:This is how it works in humanity.
Speaker:And the core to it all,
Speaker:and this is why it's such a
Speaker:unique journey,
Speaker:is really letting go of control.
Speaker:And that looks so different
Speaker:for every single person.
Speaker:But that is where we reclaim our energy.
Speaker:It's where we have our
Speaker:personal agency to choose
Speaker:where do we put our attention.
Speaker:And those two things
Speaker:together is what brings us back to
Speaker:How do we then show up with
Speaker:this presence that I can't
Speaker:describe to you except that
Speaker:everybody else will be like,
Speaker:you're different, Josh.
Speaker:What changed in you?
Speaker:And you can't even tell people it just is.
Speaker:So is there a framework to get you there?
Speaker:There's some general outlines of it,
Speaker:but it's really you doing your work,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:is why there's a thousand
Speaker:books a month published on
Speaker:business strategies that
Speaker:are all the same with a
Speaker:different do steps one
Speaker:through seven and you'll
Speaker:succeed we all have our own
Speaker:perspective our own
Speaker:experiences and our own way
Speaker:to get there we just need
Speaker:somebody to tell us it's
Speaker:safe enough to explore it
Speaker:on our own all right
Speaker:you're speaking like,
Speaker:it's funny because you're
Speaker:speaking and I'm like, you know, yeah,
Speaker:uh-huh.
Speaker:I was just, I was a couple months ago,
Speaker:I was at my entrepreneur group, Yo,
Speaker:in my forum and we were in a, we had our,
Speaker:I think it was our holiday party.
Speaker:It was a few months back and
Speaker:some of the spouses were
Speaker:there and a couple months later, my,
Speaker:you know, forum mate was like,
Speaker:my wife kept asking me after
Speaker:the party she's like what
Speaker:is like what's going on
Speaker:with josh like he just
Speaker:looks like he's he's
Speaker:glowing like he's just like
Speaker:and I had that experience
Speaker:when I went through my
Speaker:journey and I went through
Speaker:that and like I always say
Speaker:the only the only path
Speaker:forward is through and when
Speaker:I went through that journey
Speaker:there was this
Speaker:lightness about me this
Speaker:essence this aura that
Speaker:people do pick up on it's
Speaker:natural for us to do this
Speaker:but I can't tell you how
Speaker:many people is it like you
Speaker:look different you're
Speaker:changed like how you you're
Speaker:glowing like I'm living I'm
Speaker:I'm saying yes to the
Speaker:things that resonate and I
Speaker:loved how you brought up the
Speaker:giving up control,
Speaker:like the surrender
Speaker:experiment that you helped
Speaker:guide me through, right?
Speaker:Some of these things was, you know,
Speaker:just saying yes to what
Speaker:resonates and going and going.
Speaker:And that experiment,
Speaker:I guess it's called an experiment for me,
Speaker:but like that journey was
Speaker:the path to wholeness.
Speaker:It wasn't like the thing I
Speaker:had to do to get to the thing.
Speaker:It was literally, that's why you can't,
Speaker:explain it.
Speaker:You can probably put it in
Speaker:metaphors and you can put
Speaker:it in what the result you got,
Speaker:but you can't say, well,
Speaker:this is the five-step
Speaker:program to self-exploration
Speaker:and wholeness.
Speaker:It's like, yes,
Speaker:I had to make hard decisions.
Speaker:Yes,
Speaker:I had to have a tribe around me that were,
Speaker:no matter what, they're not
Speaker:going to judge anything
Speaker:they're just going to hold
Speaker:that space for me to list
Speaker:hold that for me as I'm
Speaker:going through it because
Speaker:it's it's the human
Speaker:experience and this is what
Speaker:you're created you've
Speaker:created this space for for
Speaker:for for people to do that
Speaker:and and in that space
Speaker:And that's what this podcast,
Speaker:this is where you and I are
Speaker:kind of in the same boat here is like,
Speaker:I'm not in the business of
Speaker:symptom management anymore.
Speaker:I'm not in the business of
Speaker:helping people make money
Speaker:for the sake of making money.
Speaker:It's like, we want high impact.
Speaker:We want,
Speaker:we want to help transform the
Speaker:planet one person at a time.
Speaker:And that's why I love
Speaker:working with you and
Speaker:talking with you about all
Speaker:your concepts and feelings
Speaker:because it's through your
Speaker:own journey that you're now called.
Speaker:You said it in the beginning,
Speaker:you're called to help
Speaker:people in this capacity and
Speaker:you found your zone of genius.
Speaker:You're calling the thing
Speaker:that you're trying to do
Speaker:and doing right now is
Speaker:because you're moving in that direction.
Speaker:And, and when that happens,
Speaker:these high level,
Speaker:high impact people are also
Speaker:rippling out and helping more people.
Speaker:So it's this big collective experience.
Speaker:One thing.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I mean,
Speaker:think about your journey in the
Speaker:last year and a half.
Speaker:And if I told you exactly what to do,
Speaker:with your business,
Speaker:with your wife and your family,
Speaker:with your own journey
Speaker:through different medicines
Speaker:in different countries,
Speaker:you would have either one
Speaker:told me to go jump off a cliff.
Speaker:We probably wouldn't be friends anymore.
Speaker:And if you'd actually listened to me,
Speaker:you'd be in a weird spot
Speaker:right now because you
Speaker:wouldn't understand why the
Speaker:pain of it all, the journey of it all,
Speaker:the beauty of it all
Speaker:you didn't actually get to
Speaker:make those decisions, which is the point,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:And you can't,
Speaker:no matter how much we talk about it,
Speaker:it's really the act, right?
Speaker:It's the act.
Speaker:Like I could not,
Speaker:and that's why I like say when you,
Speaker:but I think some of the
Speaker:things that are really
Speaker:important is if you're
Speaker:really focused on what you
Speaker:want and why you want it, like,
Speaker:For me, it's like, throw out the how,
Speaker:throw out the when,
Speaker:and just be clear on that.
Speaker:Because I couldn't tell you,
Speaker:I could not write the book on how I...
Speaker:how I got to where I got, right?
Speaker:I was going through the,
Speaker:just leaning in and that unknown,
Speaker:but I started to understand
Speaker:the more I've leaned into
Speaker:what was in my resonance, in my trueness,
Speaker:when it felt right,
Speaker:when it was right here, not just here,
Speaker:when I was aligning the two,
Speaker:the breadcrumbs
Speaker:you know the synchronicities
Speaker:started falling into place
Speaker:and that's where I knew for
Speaker:me that's my litmus test to
Speaker:remind me from whatever
Speaker:source you think of that
Speaker:I'm on the right path
Speaker:because I feel like that's
Speaker:how my formula works and I
Speaker:feel like that's what I
Speaker:know with other people that
Speaker:have gone through this
Speaker:journey of transformation
Speaker:or healing or spiritual
Speaker:growth or anything like
Speaker:that is like keep leaning
Speaker:into what is in alignment with you
Speaker:And that was probably the
Speaker:most powerful lesson that I was like,
Speaker:you didn't tell me to do that,
Speaker:but you held me not accountable,
Speaker:but asking me those
Speaker:questions constantly
Speaker:because I had to be
Speaker:re-reminded because the
Speaker:story is going to go into, well,
Speaker:what about this?
Speaker:Or I got to please this
Speaker:person or I'm afraid of
Speaker:this reaction because we
Speaker:all have that in us, right?
Speaker:We all have programs, right?
Speaker:And to me,
Speaker:that was the biggest part was
Speaker:having the right person
Speaker:help me to just understand
Speaker:what I was capable of and
Speaker:having that courage, right?
Speaker:We talk tribes all the time, you and me,
Speaker:like that's the word I say,
Speaker:find your tribe because
Speaker:people going through the journey,
Speaker:their journey alongside you,
Speaker:To me, that's the comfort that I get.
Speaker:That's the safe space rather
Speaker:than feeling like you're
Speaker:isolated and like you said,
Speaker:doing it on your own.
Speaker:No,
Speaker:this is the human experience if you
Speaker:want it.
Speaker:Or it could be this
Speaker:experience if you want it, right?
Speaker:I won't go there, but... You know,
Speaker:it's interesting listening to you, Josh,
Speaker:because who you are just one year later
Speaker:from conversations we were
Speaker:having where you,
Speaker:like so many successful
Speaker:entrepreneurs and business owners,
Speaker:like loved your intellect.
Speaker:Your pride was wrapped
Speaker:around your intellect, you know,
Speaker:with the fact that, you know,
Speaker:all the doctoral degrees
Speaker:you have and just the knowledge you had.
Speaker:And what I find, especially with
Speaker:with those of us that are
Speaker:just these driven
Speaker:entrepreneurs is that we forget.
Speaker:We forget that we are infinite souls,
Speaker:and I don't care what you believe,
Speaker:whether it's,
Speaker:as long as you believe something,
Speaker:then this will resonate with you,
Speaker:but we're infinite souls
Speaker:that are temporarily
Speaker:housing this body that does
Speaker:nothing on its own except
Speaker:for has these amazing sensations
Speaker:that input into our system.
Speaker:And we have this brain that
Speaker:sits on top that interprets those signals,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:And then we have the context
Speaker:of everything from our
Speaker:family history to our schooling history,
Speaker:to our jobs, to our partners,
Speaker:all these pieces overlay on top.
Speaker:And it then tells us,
Speaker:here's what I'm choosing
Speaker:that my experience means today.
Speaker:And then our intellect is
Speaker:this last piece on top,
Speaker:but it's actually the last in the chain.
Speaker:And we think often that
Speaker:because it's the piece that
Speaker:is last before something
Speaker:comes out of our mouth,
Speaker:that it's the most important.
Speaker:And the most important is
Speaker:who we are as souls.
Speaker:And then this body we've
Speaker:been given and the incredible senses.
Speaker:And that we get choice to
Speaker:shift what it means for us.
Speaker:We don't have to just go
Speaker:with whatever this first
Speaker:thing that pops in our head,
Speaker:because our intellect is so
Speaker:great and smart.
Speaker:We can sit with it if we've
Speaker:built capacity.
Speaker:And we can choose a
Speaker:different ending to the story,
Speaker:a different meaning to it.
Speaker:We can say, you know what?
Speaker:That person was an asshole,
Speaker:but I bet they had the worst day ever.
Speaker:I'm going to get curious about this.
Speaker:You know,
Speaker:we have that choice all the time.
Speaker:We don't exercise it often enough.
Speaker:That's huge.
Speaker:Well, that,
Speaker:that was a big part of where my learn,
Speaker:like I literally was reading a book in
Speaker:I found it in the Amazon
Speaker:where I was and doing my healing stuff.
Speaker:And there's this little book
Speaker:library and I picked up a
Speaker:book and it was on intuition.
Speaker:And it was all about
Speaker:the intellect being,
Speaker:moving the intellect from
Speaker:being the master to the servant.
Speaker:And I think it was a book by
Speaker:Osho called Intuition.
Speaker:And oldie but goodie,
Speaker:it even had the essence of
Speaker:like mildew in the book.
Speaker:It was so like old.
Speaker:But it was my journey from
Speaker:here to here and connecting these two,
Speaker:not using this as the only way,
Speaker:And as I get deeper and
Speaker:deeper into my growth,
Speaker:and this is why I love
Speaker:helping men move from here to here,
Speaker:not taking this as the only thing we use.
Speaker:This is superpower.
Speaker:But how do we use it as the servant,
Speaker:not the master?
Speaker:And how do we, and, and you can,
Speaker:you can go woo or science on this.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And you can treat,
Speaker:teach people how to connect
Speaker:with their intuition, with their feelings,
Speaker:with their embodiment.
Speaker:Cause that's what you do in this program.
Speaker:You've taught me embodiment work.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:A lot of men are still the fields,
Speaker:but like literally feel, you know?
Speaker:And so moving from here to
Speaker:here has been a big part of my journey.
Speaker:And yeah,
Speaker:It's so much more impactful
Speaker:is not the word I'm going for,
Speaker:but like that's,
Speaker:it's so much more rewarding
Speaker:to be able to sense and, and,
Speaker:and make decisions as a leader,
Speaker:as from a bigger part of me where.
Speaker:This doesn't always get more.
Speaker:I'm practicing this art now of non-doing,
Speaker:of literally sitting and silent.
Speaker:It's been a good ride for me, for sure.
Speaker:So I know everybody
Speaker:listening to this isn't
Speaker:going to fully understand,
Speaker:and maybe you forget too,
Speaker:but the hours of
Speaker:conversations you and I
Speaker:have had where you are just
Speaker:stuck in your head,
Speaker:where you are struggling so hard.
Speaker:to let go of the thing that
Speaker:you know has made you money,
Speaker:has gotten you the titles
Speaker:and the degrees and
Speaker:everything you had built in your life.
Speaker:And I'm not calling you out
Speaker:because you're unique.
Speaker:You're not.
Speaker:But this conversation is about us.
Speaker:And that was such a deep
Speaker:part of your journey.
Speaker:I don't even know how to
Speaker:convey that to the listeners,
Speaker:except that if you're
Speaker:struggling with that,
Speaker:this is deeply real.
Speaker:And it actually makes... I
Speaker:want to share one other thing.
Speaker:I am a huge advocate for
Speaker:shifting the state of
Speaker:masculinity in society today.
Speaker:And what I mean by that is
Speaker:too often we talk about
Speaker:toxic masculinity.
Speaker:And I don't believe there's
Speaker:any such thing.
Speaker:There's no such thing as
Speaker:toxic masculinity or femininity.
Speaker:There's a really terrible
Speaker:toxic expression of it.
Speaker:But masculinity at its core,
Speaker:femininity at its core are beautiful.
Speaker:We all have both sides of this thing.
Speaker:And being able to appreciate,
Speaker:have gratitude for,
Speaker:and really let out and balance,
Speaker:maybe a good use of the word balance,
Speaker:The masculine and the
Speaker:feminine in our lives is so
Speaker:healthy and men and women
Speaker:both need to lean into this
Speaker:because you have female
Speaker:entrepreneurs who are way
Speaker:too into their masculine
Speaker:and probably have a
Speaker:masculine partner who's so
Speaker:afraid of his feminine,
Speaker:doesn't know how to let his
Speaker:feminine partner.
Speaker:step into her feminine at
Speaker:the end of the day and so
Speaker:it's it's it's compounding
Speaker:this situation and what I
Speaker:found when I got divorced
Speaker:is that I was so scared to
Speaker:be a dad on my own I was so
Speaker:scared that I didn't have
Speaker:any sort of intuition and I
Speaker:wasn't empathetic at all
Speaker:because that's what I was
Speaker:told and honestly probably
Speaker:showed that in my life and
Speaker:what I found doing this
Speaker:work is men are incredibly empathetic
Speaker:when we trust ourselves.
Speaker:And the beauty of the
Speaker:intuition of women and the
Speaker:empathy of men when they
Speaker:are used in their
Speaker:healthiest expression is
Speaker:such an awesome combination.
Speaker:And it takes men,
Speaker:I bring this up because it
Speaker:takes men out of their head
Speaker:into their body and you
Speaker:have to start trusting yourself.
Speaker:I love that.
Speaker:You and I are both connected
Speaker:in our Front Row Dads community,
Speaker:and it's men's work, right?
Speaker:We teach, we learn,
Speaker:and we experience what I
Speaker:call the divine masculine,
Speaker:the new masculine,
Speaker:where we're leaning into
Speaker:these parts of us, not the egoic stuff,
Speaker:not the wounded parts of us.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Because the wounded
Speaker:masculine and the wounded
Speaker:feminine that are both
Speaker:doing this together, you know,
Speaker:is not what we're talking about here.
Speaker:It's this beauty of where
Speaker:we're moving into embracing
Speaker:these gifts and break trust.
Speaker:I love that.
Speaker:Like just trust in your own
Speaker:your own being like because
Speaker:that that's where.
Speaker:And I'm glad you went there
Speaker:because I think a lot of
Speaker:what we're doing here is
Speaker:not just professional or personal growth.
Speaker:It really is rooted around this masculine,
Speaker:this way and manner in
Speaker:which we have both and we nurture both.
Speaker:And we recognize how to grow
Speaker:from that and move into that space.
Speaker:And I think that's really
Speaker:what I've been learning a
Speaker:lot in our tribes and with...
Speaker:with the wisdom that we have
Speaker:and that you've imparted is like,
Speaker:it's okay to be you.
Speaker:It's okay to be this part in
Speaker:you when it's healthy,
Speaker:when it's not coming from a
Speaker:source of a wound or from a
Speaker:maladaptive component, right?
Speaker:Well,
Speaker:let's shift gears because I want to know
Speaker:where you're taking this.
Speaker:Cause this is the new stuff.
Speaker:This is the fun stuff.
Speaker:This is the, the cutting edge, I guess,
Speaker:things of you, you built, you built this,
Speaker:you're building this new community,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:This capacity community.
Speaker:Tell me a little bit about
Speaker:what it is and how I,
Speaker:how I and others can get involved.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So it's less of a community than it is a,
Speaker:a curated collection of, of,
Speaker:leaders who want to do this work together.
Speaker:I hear too often capacity.
Speaker:I know we've said it a lot
Speaker:on this call and yes,
Speaker:it is the name of this
Speaker:project that's coming
Speaker:together because capacity
Speaker:is a real thing in most of our lives.
Speaker:especially those of us that
Speaker:are seven and eight figure leaders,
Speaker:which is just kind of who I
Speaker:resonate with or high six
Speaker:figure elite coaches are
Speaker:really playing in the same
Speaker:space where we don't know
Speaker:how to get it all done.
Speaker:We don't know how to show up
Speaker:at home and at work without
Speaker:losing our edge and building out.
Speaker:who we are, leaning into having fun,
Speaker:staying healthy,
Speaker:being able to go into our forties,
Speaker:fifties,
Speaker:sixties and beyond in a way where
Speaker:we're not just grinding it out and,
Speaker:you know,
Speaker:got this soul sucking hustle
Speaker:underneath us to try to make it work.
Speaker:That that's not the only way.
Speaker:So I'm putting together this,
Speaker:calling it a leadership collective.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And it's called capacity and
Speaker:And the first,
Speaker:the first one's going to be
Speaker:May twenty eighth at eleven a.m.
Speaker:Pacific,
Speaker:and it will be once a month from
Speaker:there on out.
Speaker:And it's a it's a it's a group of.
Speaker:It's a group of this these
Speaker:same entrepreneurs and elite coaches who.
Speaker:Ultimately.
Speaker:want to shift leadership.
Speaker:So work home and community
Speaker:all rise together.
Speaker:It's time that they're not separate,
Speaker:that they're not competing any longer.
Speaker:I love that.
Speaker:And I think,
Speaker:Shifting the culture of
Speaker:leadership and authenticity
Speaker:towards authenticity and
Speaker:this collective well-being.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:Like this is we've had so
Speaker:many conversations about these things.
Speaker:They're literally forming.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:This is this is bringing
Speaker:this to a level that I feel is.
Speaker:we're not only going in our
Speaker:own lives again,
Speaker:it's mirroring our
Speaker:profession and our professions, but this,
Speaker:this conscious collective
Speaker:of the part equals the whole, right.
Speaker:These doing it from all like, not just you,
Speaker:not just me,
Speaker:not just the people that are in the group,
Speaker:but it's becoming where we
Speaker:all get to share and, and,
Speaker:this community of sharing
Speaker:and growing so we can grow
Speaker:together in a way that is serving,
Speaker:in a way that's servant leadership,
Speaker:but from this place of
Speaker:You know, we,
Speaker:we've talked back and forth about,
Speaker:you know,
Speaker:our zones of genius and how they
Speaker:match up with, you know,
Speaker:helping people in our own
Speaker:perspective ways,
Speaker:in our own unique ways and
Speaker:allowing people to choose.
Speaker:Like that's part of the process is like,
Speaker:it's a choose your own adventure guys.
Speaker:You know, you don't have to go one way,
Speaker:but you do have to,
Speaker:you do have to hang around
Speaker:the people that are doing it.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:The, the, the whole adage of like, you are,
Speaker:you know,
Speaker:you become the five people
Speaker:you're closest around.
Speaker:And this is kind of how that vibe is,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:It's like heart-centered
Speaker:people that are here to,
Speaker:that are not just into growth and made it,
Speaker:like we're all in the journey together.
Speaker:And so where can we go for that?
Speaker:What's the site?
Speaker:So my website is threexbold.com,
Speaker:the number three, the letter X,
Speaker:and then bold.com.
Speaker:You can go right there.
Speaker:If you want to hit slash capacity,
Speaker:you can get right to the
Speaker:website that describes what
Speaker:this collective is.
Speaker:And you can request a guest ticket.
Speaker:So we want to invite you to
Speaker:come experience it, to come embody it,
Speaker:to come see what are these
Speaker:other leaders like?
Speaker:What is this space held?
Speaker:It's not a teaching.
Speaker:It's not a masterclass.
Speaker:It's not knowledge-based.
Speaker:This is truly finding the
Speaker:wisdom in the room.
Speaker:It's a group of like-minded,
Speaker:like-hearted entrepreneurs
Speaker:and business owners.
Speaker:And it's also filled with
Speaker:other elite coaches doing
Speaker:work around capacity like you, Josh,
Speaker:because capacity means a
Speaker:lot of different things for each of us.
Speaker:Once we can start to lay the
Speaker:foundation of expanding it,
Speaker:then we can look at what do we need?
Speaker:Maybe you need to go on a
Speaker:journey of health.
Speaker:Maybe you need to go on a
Speaker:journey of expansion in
Speaker:your business or your
Speaker:marriage or nervous system
Speaker:work or breath work.
Speaker:I don't know what your
Speaker:specific journey is.
Speaker:And it's going to shift over time.
Speaker:But what we're creating is this flat room.
Speaker:There are no gurus.
Speaker:There's nobody on soapboxes
Speaker:talking to you.
Speaker:We're all shoulder to shoulder learning.
Speaker:And there's so much wisdom
Speaker:in the room and so much
Speaker:compassion because we're
Speaker:all in the same boat.
Speaker:And done in a way that I
Speaker:think is in really good
Speaker:resonance and where people
Speaker:are trying to learn how
Speaker:their capacity to experience things
Speaker:I think so many people are
Speaker:doing a masterclass and
Speaker:then they're putting you in
Speaker:a funnel and then they're
Speaker:getting you into their
Speaker:their one signature program,
Speaker:like everybody,
Speaker:how many programs have we
Speaker:all bought that we never actually did?
Speaker:Because it's just more of the,
Speaker:this is how I've done it.
Speaker:And if you want my success,
Speaker:this is how I want to do it for you.
Speaker:And that doesn't work, right?
Speaker:This is,
Speaker:this is part of that process of
Speaker:the experience and,
Speaker:and being surrounded like in, in,
Speaker:embodied by all of these awesome,
Speaker:like people that are all
Speaker:here to give and get, you know,
Speaker:I always say just give as
Speaker:much as you can and get as
Speaker:much as you can,
Speaker:but it's that energy
Speaker:exchange when it feels right.
Speaker:You don't feel like you're
Speaker:being sucked dry and you
Speaker:don't feel like you're giving too much.
Speaker:It's because, you know,
Speaker:you and I've had been in
Speaker:certain circles where you
Speaker:just feel uplifted and, and,
Speaker:And you get so much out of
Speaker:it by just showing up that it's this,
Speaker:you can't speak it, right?
Speaker:This is why a plant medicine journey,
Speaker:you can't talk to somebody
Speaker:because there's no
Speaker:vocabulary in our human
Speaker:language for what you experience.
Speaker:So you can only say what you get out of it,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:And so-
Speaker:Awesome.
Speaker:I can't wait to,
Speaker:I can't wait to join this one.
Speaker:Cause this is,
Speaker:this is exactly where I
Speaker:think we need to be in
Speaker:order to be our best in order to be,
Speaker:we always talk about being
Speaker:the best version of ourselves.
Speaker:And this is, this is kind of like, well,
Speaker:how do you do that?
Speaker:You hang around with really
Speaker:good people doing different things.
Speaker:in showing up in the world
Speaker:in their way and their full
Speaker:authentic whole selves or, or in the,
Speaker:in the journey, like here's the deal.
Speaker:This is what I want people
Speaker:to really understand too,
Speaker:is nobody's ever like fixed, right?
Speaker:It's the journey to wholeness, right?
Speaker:When I'm, when I'm enlightened,
Speaker:it's because this body just
Speaker:explodes and I'm up into the ether,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:That's not where I want to go.
Speaker:I'm here because I'm
Speaker:experiencing the journey
Speaker:every step of the way.
Speaker:And I'm, I'm,
Speaker:grateful for all the
Speaker:learning experiences I have
Speaker:and I'm it's just like it
Speaker:just keeps getting deeper
Speaker:and better and deeper and
Speaker:better and deeper and
Speaker:better and it's not all perfect either
Speaker:Like if you're on the journey,
Speaker:it's actually gonna get worse sometimes,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:Yes, yes.
Speaker:And let's be clear so
Speaker:everybody understands too,
Speaker:like your journey is a journey of health.
Speaker:That's what this podcast is for.
Speaker:That's what your mission of
Speaker:de-prescribing ten million
Speaker:prescriptions is all about.
Speaker:And I think it's worth
Speaker:bringing this back home
Speaker:with why have you and I worked together?
Speaker:Why are you gonna be part of
Speaker:this capacity leadership collective?
Speaker:you know, why does this topic,
Speaker:how does it relate to health?
Speaker:And I'm gonna tee you up and
Speaker:I do want your perspective on this.
Speaker:And for me, it's, you know,
Speaker:capacity being the bottom
Speaker:layer that allows you to
Speaker:explore these avenues like health.
Speaker:It brings the beginning
Speaker:parts of peace into your life.
Speaker:And as somebody who's been
Speaker:on this journey of all sides of health,
Speaker:what does peace mean to your health,
Speaker:Josh?
Speaker:Well,
Speaker:I'm glad you brought that up because that,
Speaker:that word peace, right?
Speaker:This is one of those words where we,
Speaker:we strive for it rather than be in it.
Speaker:And for me,
Speaker:thank you for asking because like,
Speaker:you know me and it's,
Speaker:I use the analogy of if you
Speaker:owned a million-dollar horse,
Speaker:you would treat it really good.
Speaker:You'd give it the right food.
Speaker:You'd have the groomer.
Speaker:You'd have the trainer.
Speaker:Or if you owned a Ferrari,
Speaker:you wouldn't put crappy gas in it.
Speaker:You wouldn't drive it around
Speaker:all over the place.
Speaker:You would take really good
Speaker:care of it because it was
Speaker:so valuable to you.
Speaker:Well, I love...
Speaker:teaching people to treat
Speaker:their bodies like they've
Speaker:treated their business or
Speaker:like they've treated that piece of thing,
Speaker:because this body, mind,
Speaker:and spirit that we have,
Speaker:you said it like we're in
Speaker:this incarnation where we're,
Speaker:eternal souls but we living
Speaker:this human existence and we
Speaker:only have this finite time
Speaker:in this body to experience
Speaker:in this time and space and
Speaker:so how do we make life
Speaker:vibrantly healthy and it's
Speaker:it's not just the physical
Speaker:and it's not just the
Speaker:emotional and it's moving
Speaker:into the energetic so for me
Speaker:Finding peace is one,
Speaker:living my full authentic self.
Speaker:And for me,
Speaker:that's teaching others how to
Speaker:treat their bodies like
Speaker:they've treated their
Speaker:businesses and moving in that direction.
Speaker:And blending body, heart, like heart, mind,
Speaker:and spirit.
Speaker:is putting it all together
Speaker:so we can be in that space.
Speaker:We can be in that space of wholeness.
Speaker:Because for me,
Speaker:peace is sitting with myself knowing
Speaker:I'm truly myself.
Speaker:I'm not doing it for anybody else.
Speaker:And I was,
Speaker:and those moments of clarity and
Speaker:brilliance and peace,
Speaker:peace to me is like the mind is quiet,
Speaker:but it's still moving and
Speaker:I'm getting the downloads and I'm, I'm,
Speaker:I'm serving and putting,
Speaker:I always say putting a dent
Speaker:in the universe in the right way.
Speaker:yeah so that's that's my
Speaker:little impression of where
Speaker:it is and I I love trying I
Speaker:love helping other people
Speaker:get there in their own way
Speaker:and how many you got to
Speaker:take care of your body so
Speaker:you can take care of the
Speaker:mind so you can take care
Speaker:of the energetics and you
Speaker:got to take care of the
Speaker:energetics so you can take
Speaker:care of the mind so you can
Speaker:take care of the body and
Speaker:how many more prescriptions
Speaker:are we going to get to
Speaker:de-prescribe because
Speaker:On this journey to create capacity,
Speaker:we've regulated nervous systems.
Speaker:We've created calm.
Speaker:We've helped people let go
Speaker:of control that just keeps
Speaker:them so plugged in at this
Speaker:like gripping deep level.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And that is the bigger
Speaker:mission for me is like,
Speaker:how do you deprescribe?
Speaker:You make them unnecessary.
Speaker:How do you make them unnecessary?
Speaker:Well,
Speaker:if you're living a full life in your way,
Speaker:well,
Speaker:that's the true essence of humanity.
Speaker:You probably will never be a diabetic.
Speaker:You probably don't need a statin.
Speaker:You probably will never or
Speaker:not have to go on your –
Speaker:anxiety meds, you know,
Speaker:these things don't exist in
Speaker:a world where you're full
Speaker:and you've built capacity.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Cause, cause, and it's not,
Speaker:I always like make the disclaimer.
Speaker:It's like, it's not medications.
Speaker:Aren't bad for people.
Speaker:but they become necessary
Speaker:when we're out of alignment
Speaker:and so it's kind of like
Speaker:moving it from the other
Speaker:side it's like well when
Speaker:you're in alignment they
Speaker:are become necessary
Speaker:because you don't need to
Speaker:numb the anxiety or the
Speaker:pain or any of those things
Speaker:now that doesn't mean that
Speaker:you're bad person for
Speaker:taking them that just means
Speaker:there are choice points you
Speaker:can make in your lifestyle
Speaker:and this is how we're
Speaker:talking this is why we
Speaker:brought these communities to to
Speaker:to manifest in the way they have,
Speaker:which is so beautiful.
Speaker:To explore what's possible.
Speaker:It doesn't get any better than this,
Speaker:right?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:No, it doesn't.
Speaker:So how can our listeners connect with you?
Speaker:Obviously, it's threexbold.com.
Speaker:You're probably on LinkedIn, right?
Speaker:And that's it.
Speaker:Those are the only two places.
Speaker:I'm not on social media for the last,
Speaker:it's been three years now.
Speaker:as just something I choose.
Speaker:Just for me,
Speaker:that's what I needed for my own sanity.
Speaker:So yeah, those two places are great.
Speaker:And I just wanna leave everybody with,
Speaker:the biggest lesson for me
Speaker:in all of this work has
Speaker:been that the leadership you want,
Speaker:whether it's at work or at
Speaker:home or in your community,
Speaker:it can't be forced.
Speaker:It's gotta be funded.
Speaker:And I encourage you to find
Speaker:your way to fund it.
Speaker:And maybe joining us at capacity is it.
Speaker:And if not, find your own way.
Speaker:Beautiful, my friend.
Speaker:Thank you for spending time with me today,
Speaker:sharing your mission, sharing your vision,
Speaker:and more importantly, just sharing life.
Speaker:sharing your gifts with me
Speaker:over these years has been
Speaker:has been such a true gift
Speaker:for me you you have gifted
Speaker:um in your own ways so much
Speaker:more than I could probably
Speaker:express in words so thank
Speaker:you for showing up in the
Speaker:word world in your way
Speaker:because this is this is in
Speaker:my mind how healing happens
Speaker:so thank you my friend yeah
Speaker:it's been my pleasure to contribute
Speaker:To your journey.
Speaker:Thank you, my friend.
Speaker:This has been an awesome episode.
Speaker:This has been great.
Speaker:Thank you so much.
Speaker:Go check out threexbold.com.
Speaker:Let's get this capacity moving.
Speaker:And I can't wait to join you
Speaker:on the twenty eighth, man.
Speaker:It's going to be super fun.
Speaker:I'm excited.
Speaker:Yeah, me too.
Speaker:See you all there.
Speaker:All right, guys.
Speaker:This a wrap.
Speaker:Until next time.
Speaker:Stay well, everyone.
